Well, That'll Learn Me

Damn, damn, DAMN!

As the good Agent 86 said, missed it by that much!

'S what I get for

1. Not working Friday
2. Not checking my work email on Friday
3. Not checking my work email all weekend, on ideological grounds
   
4. Being a naive little bloggie-boy about how the Washington Post feels about reprinting scurrilous crap from the Internet
   

Poop. The letter they did publish was weak, weak, weak.

Mr. Jingo;

We are in receipt of your letter to the editor and are considering it for publication.

We need to verify that you wrote the letter and did not acquire any portion of it from other sources. [Other than properly attributed quotes.]

Damned right I wrote it all by myself. It was a corker.

We need to know that you are using your real name.

I did, of course.

Did you send or post this letter or a similar item to any other media, internet forums [including washingtonpost.com], or blogs?

Oh, fucksocks!

We need to know, if it is not already mentioned, what your involvement if any is with the subject matter.

I am, sir, the privatest of citizens, and beyond the obvious emotional gratification the act engenders, I have no personal interest in pointing out that Mr. Gerson is a twat of the first water.

Please respond to this email with the verifications.

Please provide us, if you haven't already, a day and evening phone number that we can contact you for any questions we may have.

We will need to edit the letter for style and/or space considerations.

The initial edited version is below, please let us know if you have any concerns regarding them.

Further editing may be needed as we approach deadline.

Thank you for the submission,

John

It was intact. They hadn't touched a word.

To the Editors of the Washington Post

Sent this off this morning...

Dear Sirs;

At first I was puzzled at Michael Gerson’s discourse on satire (“Vulgarian at the Gate,” Wednesday, June 18, 2008). Why, I wondered, does he use his forum at the Post to point out what a great many of us know already: namely, that Al Franken (now running for Senate) is a comedian who has occasionally used naughty words in speaking truth to power? Comedians are supposed to make people like Gerson uncomfortable — that’s what they do.

Then it hit me: Gerson’s column was itself satire! How else to explain a harangue on “civility” by a man who, in his role as White House speechwriter, was the leading advertising copywriter for the Iraq War, now in its fifth year, with more than 4,000 Americans killed, nearly 30,000 injured, and countless tens of thousands of Iraqis dead, and millions more displaced? The author of the “smoking gun/mushroom cloud” image, demanding more “civility” in political discourse! Hilarious!

Mr. Gerson can lecture us from his fainting couch all he likes. But as he does so, I encourage him also to consider the difference between that which is merely vulgar and that which is obscene.

Respectfully,

Neddie Jingo

Edit: Just received an auto-email back that strongly suggests that since I posted this here, my letter won't be published. Ah, well.