Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Those Are Her Jugs

Apparently, I have become, through no effort on my part, the Internet's Leading Purveyor of Kate Hudson Porn.

Not the hardcore stuff (although any links to naughty QT movies would never go unappreciated), but the Kate-in-her-panties-and-camisole-with-Gibson-Les-Paul kind. Long ago, I posted a still from "Almost Famous" to illustrate an amusing correction in the print edition of the WashPost. Now, if you perform a Google Image Search on Kate's lovely form, absolutely the number-one return is that pic.

Golly, I wonder if Kate ever Googles herself...?
Dear Mr. Jingo,

I just noticed you posted my pic on your cute little blog. Now that I'm at a loose end, I'm looking for a midseason replacement. Is that guy on the bagpipes really you? Your totally hot. Wanna do cyber...?
I wouldn't have known about this signal honor, but for the fact that my traffic pretty much quadrupled overnight on Monday. I mean, just blam! At first I thought Wolcott or PZ Myers or somebody really big had linked to something, but when I went into the individual stats it was just relentless image searches, all of them to that Kate pic. I was flummoxed -- I'd seen plenty of these searches before, but never in this volume.

Wonder Woman enlightened me. The Owen Wilson thing. The lummox mooned after Kate, driving him to the most desperate act a man can perform: The Failed Hollywood Suicide.

Well, Owen, you lantern-jawed chowderhead, you have driven her into my arms!

In for a penny...





6 comments:

Carl the Big Fool said...

Too funny. You'd think we'd learn to predict these things. Couple years ago I made a one-sentence post about one of Yahoo Personals' models, and suddenly got a world of traffic from lonely dorks looking for more information on her.

Kurt Russell said...

Nice nips there, Katie!

Will Divide said...

Wot's'at, SHAG carpetin'??

glue birl said...

First of all, don't call my boyfriend a chowderhead. He needs alot of lovin' right now and I am fully prepared to do my part.

Secondly, Kate Hudson gets on my nerves. I hope Wonder Woman beats her up.

Blowing Shit Up With Gas said...

In for a Penny Lane! (A character who, in Almost Famous, also tried to off herself.)

bobby lightfoot said...

I want to dribble Gewurtztremeiner on her thigh and pop all her blackheads.

I'll pay.