Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Resignation

Ah, Scotty, source of so much fog,
Take a seat, have a gargle of grog.
It must have been a long, hard slog:
Not easy being a thrice-whipped dog.

Were you pushed or did you jump?
Dignity or garbage dump?
Did the landing raise a lump
Upon your secretarial rump?

Investigation's still ongoing:
It's a bitch, this never knowing.

14 comments:

XTCfan said...

Good riddance, say I. Gives me the creeps just looking at his picture. How he looks at himself in the mirror every day is beyond me.

Neddie said...

Yes, well, he has a long lifetime ahead of him -- plenty of time for mirror-gazing. Apparently some of it is going to be spent with the Decider, rocking in chairs and talking about the good old days. (1974, maybe?)

blue girl said...

Everything's gonna be just fine now that Scotty's leaving...

Haven't had time to look up who's going to be replacing him. My husband thinks they may not replace him at all.

Don't you love *The Decider* -- classic.

AG said...

...and the verse is swell. Now, I'd quit too if I had to come to work and deal with a boss who called himself "The Decider," but then again Scotty's proven time and again that normal human impulses were not at play within him...

Matt said...

What a fitting tribute to National Poetry Month. Bravo!

Neddie said...

The "Were you pushed or did you jump?" line arose from an email conversation I was having with some friends this morning: We won't know for sure for a long time, I imagine, but it's a particularly interesting question to me whether Scotty resigned because he was told to or because he'd truly had enough. Being lied to by Rove and Libby (and, for that matter, by Bush and Cheney) about Plamegate, and then going out and repeating those lies, is about the worst humiliation a press secretary can undergo. It can't have been a whole lot of fun, having to cover for such a bunch of miserable prevaricators. Of course, he didn't have to face a Watergate-era press corps, either.

blue girl said...

How 'bout this...

I think he was told to pack his bags. If war with Iran is truly on the horizon, wouldn't you rather have someone like, say, Torie Clark in that job?

Employee of the Month said...

Just in from a day of training. (Neddie, get the guitar.)

Is Tony Snow (Fox News) still on the short list to replace Scottie?

I think I'm gonna uchepf.

Blue Wren said...

Scotty left so Commander Codpiece could pretend to "clean house." If he had even a trace element of honesty, integrity or even basic human decency, he'd never have taken the job when Ari left in the first place.

Of course, Scotty might have still been a little bit idealistic. He might have taken the job because he wanted to tell the truth. But as soon as he saw The Decider and his cronies had no intention of touching anything like the truth, no matter what, if he'd had any integrity at all, he'd have resigned right then.

Really, does it matter who replaces him? We'll just get more of the same non-answers and baldfaced whoppers. We might as well not have a press secretary at all -- The Decider can just decide to do away with the position, since he knows what's best for us.

Of course, that would be too honest.

roxtar said...

You can replace your old toilet with a new toilet, but at some point, both are full of shit.

Bobby Lightfoot said...

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Scott McClueless
Go fuck yourself

helmut said...

Thew new toilet is apparently going to be Dan Senor, mouthpiece for the Iraq occupation. At least the administration recognizes that Iraq is a liability.

You slay me, Bobby.

XTCfan said...

To paraphrase Ed Helms on last night's Daily Show:
"What do you do when your policies are failing miserably? You replace the person who tells us about those policies..."

Anonymous said...

That looks like a thousand-mile stare to me. I don't think he got out in time. Not that I feel sorry for someone whose job title, in an honest world, would be Lying Sack of Shit.